


How to Believe

by Mayarene Rose (Paradise_of_Mary_Jane)



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Day 3, Fluff, Future Fic, M/M, Yuuriweek
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-25
Updated: 2017-07-25
Packaged: 2018-12-03 18:58:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,834
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11538438
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Paradise_of_Mary_Jane/pseuds/Mayarene%20Rose
Summary: It only really begins to sink in that he’s maybe not a dime-a-dozen figure skater a little while after his second (consecutive!!) World Title. When it does, Yuuri takes a few moments to be lost in his own head and just panic.





	How to Believe

**Author's Note:**

> This is not a very coherent piece and is mostly just an excuse for me to write how 1800 words of how much I love Yuuri and sing him as many praises as possible. *shrugs* what can I say? I love the guy.
> 
> Day 3 of Yuuri Week: Dreams

It only really begins to sink in that he’s maybe _not_ a dime-a-dozen figure skater a little while after his second (consecutive!!) World Title. When it does, Yuuri takes a few moments to be lost in his own head and just panic.

Yes, panicking. Panicking is good. Panicking is familiar. Panicking is safe.

If Yuuri’s not panicking, then he’d be calm and he’d be forced to think about the fact that he’s actually succeeding, which is something he definitely doesn’t want to think about.

It’s like Schrödinger’s Cat; if Yuuri’s too busy to panicking to look at the box that may or may not contain his achievements, then he doesn’t have to be upset when he opens it and find it empty, because his brain keeps insisting that it most probably is.

Panicking is limbo and Yuuri’s very good at limbo. At this point, Yuuri’s _president_ of limbo.

He hadn’t really thought about it before, had he? Hadn’t let himself get past don’t choke don’t choke don’t choke and dear god please don’t fall in every competition. His first World Title had felt like a fluke because… Well, it did.

Luck, maybe? Or maybe… Yuuri can’t really come up with a good excuse but it hadn’t really felt _real_ at the time. Standing above Viktor on a podium is surreal enough; doing it with a gold medal on his neck is… Well, it’s too much for Yuuri’s brain to comprehend.

The second one, though. Yuuri can’t come up with a good excuse for that one. It’s not a fluke, he knows as much. He’d beaten Viktor and Yurio by nearly six points, and he’d broken Yurio’s world record, as well as his own _and_ the world record for highest combined score. Yuuri would call luck again but there’s also the fact that he’s never been _that_ lucky.

Which, of course, can only lead to only one conclusion.

(He’s not mentioning the Grand Prix series. He’s not even _thinking_ about the Grand Prix series and how amazingly and surprisingly consistent he’d been in it. Amazing and consistent enough to win gold at the final, apparently?

Yuuri wonders when he’ll actually wake up from this too good to be real dream.)

“Vitya.” He nudges Viktor’s shoulder. They’re back in Hasetsu for the off-season. They’re seizing the opportunity to sleep in and eat whatever they like for as long as they can before the ice shows and training and everything else they do to remain figure skaters.

Viktor had also taken to planning their wedding which will be happening in two months because apparently two World Titles are enough and he doesn’t want to wait anymore, let alone three more years, and please Yuuri, it had been such a stupid deal, anyway, and Viktor is such a stupid, stupid man who really wants to marry Yuuri right this second, please.

Yuuri had agreed dazedly, because of course he did; he really wants to marry Viktor, too. He really, really wants to marry Viktor and if it means that he’ll be lost in a daze of his own happiness and disbelief for the rest of his life then… Yuuri forgot where he was going with this.

Dazed is a good description for what he feels like most of the time. It feels like he’s hovering through a dream with the chance of waking up slowly slipping away by the day.

Yuuri absolutely cannot wait for the day when the opportunity to wake up disappears completely and he’s trapped in this amazing dream world where he’s a two-time consecutive World Title winner and is marrying the absolute love of his life. Where things are going just a little too perfectly for Yuuri not to not wait for the punchline.

“Vitya,” he says. Viktor hums in response. His voice is still thick with sleep. Yuuri likes to think that they’ve passed the point in their relationship where he feels guilty for waking Viktor up. Even if it is--he checks the digital clock on the bedside table and winces slightly--three in the morning. Viktor never minds and he does it nearly as often as Yuuri does.

(Between that and… other activities, neither of them get much sleep in the off-season.)

“Vitya,” Yuuri says. “I think I just won a World Title. Like, for real, this time?”

Viktor hums again. The arm that he’s wrapped around Yuuri tightens and he buries his face against Yuuri’s shoulder.

“You did,” he murmurs. “I was there, remember? I got bronze.”

“But I got gold,” Yuuri says. He’s still testing the words on his mouth, seeing if they fit right. They’re starting to. “I actually won?”

“You also broke several world records, I believe.”

“I did,” Yuuri says, baffled. He feels Viktor smiling against his shoulder and press a kiss to his neck.

“You also won last year, if I recall correctly.”

“I don’t think that one really counts.” It had been such a close fight; he’d only beat Viktor for the gold by .09 points. Like he said, the first one was just pure, dumb luck. Yuuri has no idea how it happened.

“Well I do,” Viktor says. “Best PCS I’ve had in years and you still beat me.”

“I did?” It comes out as a question.

“My fiancé is the best figure skater in the world,” Viktor says. “I’m so proud to be engaged to him.”

Yuuri swallows. “And what if he doesn’t win next season?”

“We’ll be married by then and I’ll be very proud to be married to the best figure skater in the world.”

“I won’t be the best if I don’t win.”

“You’re always the best for me,” Viktor says. He raises his head to press a soft kiss to Yuuri’s lips. Yuuri can’t help but melt against it. “You’ll always be the best. I’m afraid I’m horribly biased on the matter.”

“Even if--”

Viktor is straddling him now, face so close that their noses are almost touching.

“Always.” He kisses the tip of Yuuri’s nose. “Always.” Yuuri’s forehead. “Always.” His eyelids. “Always and forever.” A long, deep kiss to his lips.

He pulls away and Yuuri finds bright, blue eyes staring back at him, full of so much love and sincerity that Yuuri can’t help but crumble against it.

“Okay then,” he says. “Okay.”

\--

Before Viktor, Yuuri can very pointedly ignore that he’s actually kinda famous. He blends too easily into the crowds; just a face mask and a bonnet and he’s indistinguishable from the other people moving in masses. It works best in big cities like Tokyo, even Fukoka, and well… all of America, really. Americans are incredibly good at being too caught up in their own lives to notice anyone around them.

Figure skaters aren’t that famous, at any rate. Not really. Their community mostly keep to themselves and their fans are small; tight knit, but small.  Of course, as usual, Viktor is the exception to this. Viktor is the figure skater everyone knows because he skates like he doesn’t even belong on earth and has the face of a god. Mere mortals can only hope to compete against that.

Apparently Yuuri can, though. Compete, that is, with the skating part. He’d never be hot enough to match Viktor’s hotness.

(Viktor disagrees with the last part. Disagrees with it with a vehemence that Yuuri’s rarely seen.)

After Viktor, Yuuri never forgets it, mostly because Viktor never lets him forget. Never.

Viktor is too noticeable, with his silver hair and designer clothes and general air of “Notice me! I am a god amongst men!” Yuuri never stood a chance against that. Viktor attracts attention wherever he goes and since Yuuri’s always with him, he also gets attention wherever he goes.

In the beginning, Yuuri had tried just standing to the side, head down, and pointedly ignoring the questions. Viktor doesn’t let him do that. He wraps his arm around Yuuri’s shoulder and sings him endless praises. Yuuri has absolutely no choice but to look up and interact with people lest Viktor exaggerate too much.

“I’m not exaggerating, love,” Viktor will always says, pouting slightly. “You are that amazing.”

Yuuri doesn’t really have an answer to that.

The first time a person approaches him instead of Viktor, while they’re walking home from the cake tasting (Yuuri did not know there were so many different types of cake. His family had worked in the service industry for generations and he had no idea there were so many types of cake. It feels like he should.) it takes Yuuri a full minute to realize that they were talking to him.

“Thank you for your support,” he manages to stutter out before taking taking a selfie with his (his??) fans. Viktor stands back, looking incredibly smug. They post it to Instagram later that day and tag Yuuri.

He stares at the notifications on his phone for a long time and tries to convince himself that it’s real. He doesn’t quite manage to but he’s getting there.

He’s getting there.

\--

Reporters have been fondly calling him ‘Japan’s Late bloomer’ since he entered the Senior Division. Yuuri used to think they said it as an insult, now he’s not so sure.

Now, they’ve also taken to asking him how he’s taking being the top men’s singles figure skater. Yuuri still finds the title of “Top Men’s Singles Figure Skater” dubious but he’s not about to say so. He never quite knows how to answer the question properly. Usually he manages to blurt out some things about focusing on his training and not really paying attention to the rankings much, which isn’t actually a lie.

“I love figure skating,” he says on a particularly succinct interview where he actually looks half-way sane. “What happens after doesn’t really matter. As long as I skate a program I’m proud of, I think I can learn to be happy with it.”

He’s not lying, at any rate. And slowly but surely, he thinks that he’s learning how to actually _be_ proud of himself.

\--

“I’m marrying a World Champion,” Viktor says against his lips. They’re in Viktor’s room at Hasetsu. Everyone’s just about given up on separating them on the night before their wedding. It’s a silly tradition anyway. It’s not like he and Viktor hadn’t practically been married for two years now.

“You’re a World Champion too,” Yuuri points out. “A five-time World Champion.”

“Hmm, you’re still better.”

“No I’m not.”

“Yuuri.”

“I’m not,” Yuuri says, because that’s the truth. Two consistent seasons isn’t enough, not for him. There’s still a lot more he needs to, not to prove exactly, but there’s still a lot left for him to do. “But I will be.”

Viktor grins and kisses him again.

“That’s what I want to hear,” he says. “You are perfect, Yuuri.”

“I’m really not.”

“Yes,” Viktor says. “You really are.”

He kisses Yuuri softly on the lips, full of gentle adoration, and Yuuri closes his eyes and lets himself fall in love all over again.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm at [tumblr!](http://katsuki-nikifcrov.tumblr.com) Come say hi :)


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